Sunshine Girl

Twelve years ago on this day, the sun shone a bit brighter than it had before. It may not even have been a visible difference, for all I know it was an overcast or cloudy day, such as I was inside most of that day and my mind was occupied with concerns other than the weather. Yet it was something that I could just sense, a special warmth and energy that the world contained, everything became clearer and sharper and more distinct, more beautiful and graceful than it had been the day before, or for that matter up until that moment in the entire history of days. That moment, which changed my life forever in ways in which I am still discovering, was the moment that Chloe Susana Nicholas came into the world, at just after 5:00 in the morning, and changed it forever.

I call Chloe my sunshine girl, among other nicknames that we have for her, some more flattering than others depending on the purposes they need to serve, but this one is from me to her and nothing can better describe how I feel about my one and only daughter, and the youngest of my two beautiful children. She is more than just a ray of sunshine, she is what you get when you open the blinds of a heretofore dark room and let the bright energy of the outside world come in, the overwhelming and momentarily blinding force that has an effect of first knocking you off your center, but which once accustomed to radiates to the core of your very being and soul.

I could go on and on like the proud father that I am about how talented and beautiful and smart she is, I could write for days on end about how much I love to hit the mute button on the TV when she is upstairs in her room singing, about how her soulful voice strikes a chord in me that resonates like all great music when it enters your consciousness.

I could describe her mind and the intelligence with which she perceives and observes the world around her, I could recite her good grades in school and accomplishments in that regard. I could spend hours musing about her beauty, her big brown eyes and her playful smile, her physical form that could serve as the model of beauty and grace in any era.

But more than all of these factors, what sets her apart is something more intangible and difficult to capture, but something that one need only spend a brief time in her presence to see and hear and feel for themselves. This something is for lack of a better description, her essence, the soul of who she is and why to be around her is like being out in the sunshine on a perfectly warm spring day. You don’t know for sure why or how, but you just know that you feel better for being alive, and being around Chloe is like that.

Chloe is like a beautiful butterfly that dazzles the mind and the soul with her colors and charm, but never stays put for long, so you know that you had better enjoy the moment. Celebrating her 12th birthday only drives home the point, as cliché as it is to say, “it was only yesterday when…” it’s the truth and the time is moving by at much too quick of a pace. Chloe is busy and active, she keeps a litany of friends and if she’s not out with them, she is often up in her room texting and talking to them, when she’s not singing or waiting to pounce on the computer as soon as her brother leaves his room, where access to the internet resides. She floats down to be a part of our lives every so often, brightens our day, and then just as quickly moves on to some other pursuit. Being a 12 year-old going on 16, I don’t imagine that will change, nor would I want it to, I want my kids to grow into their own skin and while giving them guidance, my wife and I believe in letting them develop into the people that they are meant to be.

For Chloe, I know that she will continue to light up not only my world, but all those she comes in contact with because that is her rare gift. I have never known someone so free with her soul and her beauty, so generous to all those around her, and so appreciated by so many. She is a gem among gems, and words will inevitably fail me when I try to express the love in my heart and the good fortune I feel for being able to be a part of her life. I know not what she will become in her life, whether she will attain greatness as a singer and musician, or perhaps she will become a renowned performer, or maybe she’ll end up being a teacher like her old man. The world of opportunities is before her, and I only hope that she pursues her dreams, whatever they may end up being. I do feel confident in this however, that as long as she is in this world, the skies will be a bit bluer, the air a touch crisper, the birds will sing a little sweeter, and the sun will shine brighter. And every day I will awake to this world, knowing that no matter what else may come, I’ll have sunshine in my life.