To my Iowa Friend

Dear Dorothy,

It's been awhile since we've seen each other, and while we occasionally get to talk on the phone, I mostly keep up with your life through Julie. She indicated that you had an enjoyable birthday the other day and that you are in very good spirits, which makes me happy. You deserve all the happiness in the world, for you are a truly unique and special person, and I have been fortunate in my life to come to know you well and to count you among the people that matter the most to me.

You are a friend in the truest sense of the word, one who accepts me as I am, faults and all, and who gives love without the expectation of gaining anything in return. I hope however that what I have been able to give in return is that same friendship and love to you, and that you know and have always known how important you are to me.

Quite simply, you are one of the best people I have ever known. You are generous with your time and affections, not just to me but to all of the people in your life. You are a kind-hearted and charitable person, your character and your actions are a true reflection of your faith. While many people profess certain beliefs but then fail to act in a way that is true to those beliefs, you have always been the genuine article. You probably have no idea how much I respect and admire you, which is a main point for me writing this.

I certainly don't have to tell you how many sacrifices you have made in your life for your family and friends, but I do need to tell how much I will always be in your debt for raising such a wonderful daughter as my wife, and instilling in her the virtues and morals of your character, which she so effectively instills in our own children. You are loved deeply by both of us, and by your grandchildren, who think the world of you and admire you as we do.

You practically raised Chloe when she was little and we had the privilege of living but a few blocks from you. I'll always have great memories of you pulling up to pick her up for the day, and her excitedly calling out to Ma-ma, knowing that she was going to spend the day with someone who thought the world of her. I'll always have the image of you and Jake baking chocolate chip cookies together in our kitchen during your winter visits with us, a skill by the way that Jake picked up to the point of being able to claim the second best chocolate chip cookies around to this day.

Our rambunctious card playing sessions still bring a smile to my face, not to mention the game playing sessions where we would tend to get a bit competitive, but always ended on a good note. I like to tell people about our scrabble contests, where I would come up with some clever word, only to be bested by you putting up a three-letter word worth three times the points of mine.

I love the memories I have of you resting in the recliner after putting in your time around the house, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, you wouldn't rest until the chores were done. But then you would sit back in the recliner, with a toothpick dangling from your mouth and quietly nod off, at least until you heard someone or something and then you'd start back awake and pretend as if you had never been napping, as if we would think less of you for resting.

We, and I could never think less of you for anything Dorothy. You have been such an important influence in my own life in so many ways. Your dedication to your family, your work ethic, your love of and zest for life are contagious and inspiring. You introduced me to such things as I would never otherwise have known of, from card games like 500, to Arabian horses, and even to figure skating. Not to mention your teaching me not to be afraid of a bat flying through the house. You always did what needed to be done, without complaint and without worrying about whether or not it would be appreciated.

So I just want you to know how much you are appreciated, by me and by our entire family. We may not always agree on politics or other somewhat trivial matters, but we do agree on a basic life philosophy, on the importance of living a moral, religious, and virtuous life. We agree that taking care of one's family and being a good friend, and a good person are the most important things in this life. And while neither of us is rich or famous or powerful, I think we've done pretty well for ourselves when it comes to what matters most. I count you as one of my dearest friends in this world, and my appreciation of you and my loyalty towards you knows no boundaries or limits. You told Julie that you wanted to know what I really thought of you while you were still around, and while I expect you to be around for a good long time to come, I thought now was as good a time as any to express how I feel. I only wish I could express better how highly I think of you, hopefully this imperfect attempt will suffice in getting the point across, the point being that you are pretty darn special in my book.

With all the love in my heart,
Your son-in-law
Mark